Be Different

 

I love this video. Linked from a Return of Kings article, it demonstrates two things. One of them, as discussed in the majority of comments below the article, is the observation of how different society was in 1987 compared to today. As illustrated here, people, not distracted by their smartphones and iPods, were friendlier (even the French). They didn’t mind being videotaped or interrogated by strangers. Approaching was easier. It was a carefree time.

But what do I know? I was two years old in 1987. This is a single glance at a single place featuring people high on the Small World fumes of Walt Disney World. In reality, 1987 was a turbulent time, and violent crime was nearing its apex, more than double what it is today. That’s why I try to avoid blind romanticism of the past. Some things are better, some things are worse. Ultimately, it doesn’t matter.

Why? Because of the other thing the video demonstrates, something that transcends the generations. Being different can be used to your advantage.

What normal person would go to 7-Eleven in the middle of the night and do videotaped interviews with every random person who walks into the store? Add in some clever banter, and you’ve got a recipe for social success.

Nothing particularly newsworthy happens during the video. But, in its own silly and insignificant way, it gives a glimpse of what men can do with some balls and a cultivated, unapologetic sense of humor. It is this attitude that women love. A few snippets:

“Oh it’s not on, don’t worry about it…can you sign this form?”

“You pay 10 cents to have less. It’s Weight Watchers.”

“Why’d you come here?” “Just to buy toothpaste.” “Juice bars?”

“You’ve come all the way from France to buy toothpaste?”

“Do you think we could get that mirror surgically removed from your chin?”

“Do they have 7-Elevens in France?” “No, we don’t have 7-Eleven, we have some other–” “We have Seveen Eleveen.”

No one of these comments is going to get a women into bed, but finding a way to develop a pattern of breaking out from the boredom of the world and giving people the chance to see your real personality is an absolutely essential component to being socially competent, and therefore, attractive.

So, those who have taken the red pill and know how to be different, go out there and be different. And in today’s world, that might mean nothing more than just talking to a girl. Add in a little game and it’s game over, man!

So You’re Suddenly Cocky-Funny?

Over at PUA Forums, there was a concern coming from someone who felt he had failed in transitioning from his old AFC self to cocky-funny at his workplace, noting that the girls there didn’t want to talk to him anymore. There was an insightful comment from LockDown, who expounded on a theory he had about using cocky-funny techniques on girls at work:

Im not a super PUA yet or anything but i had a theory about c and f and work.

I believe when u try it at work, you are dealing with women who have known u for so long that c&f fries their brain. They already have u set up as a friend ( u said they used to hang out). Now they see a new side of u… an attractive side. Its hard to reconcile those two things. So they kinda back off. B4 they were comfortable with u because u were in LJBF zone (unless u have more info to contrary). So it was easy for them to approach u and ask to hang out. However, when u show the alpha qualities, they now want u to lead. They are attracted so they go into ‘ i dont want to give off obvious signs that i like him’ mode.

But trust me its there. U just have to lead now. Take the rains and run with it. Im sure they are at least curious about why/how u had this personality change.

I too have noticed this phenomenon. When you go C&F on a girl you’ve never met before, she won’t bat an eye, because she doesn’t have any preconceived notions of you. But when you do it on a girl who knows you already (particularly at work, where you’re not only pegged as beta but you’re also within the bounds of a “professional” environment), your feedback may not be so welcoming.

The reason I quote LockDown’s post and not the others isn’t because there wasn’t good advice, but that it was predictable — he went “over the top,” he didn’t “calibrate correctly,” etc. But they were all based on the assumption that the girls at work didn’t like what he was doing. LockDown’s analysis adds another possibility — that they actually were attracted to their new and improved co-worker but didn’t know how to “reconcile” it. In other words, the same behavior coming from a complete stranger would have had them swooning, but because it was from their LJBF work buddy, they rationalized against their attraction.

I like the last paragraph of the comment the best. It illustrates the maxim that irrational self-confidence trumps rational defeatism every time. Assume the sale. That is the heart of cocky-funny. Without that attitude as your foundation, your cocky-funny will crash and burn, and will make girls uncomfortable. Also, he is very astute in the observation that the girls are “at least curious” about why the sudden change in attitude and behavior has come about. Even if he did take it “too far,” the female brain can’t help but wonder why. And if they’re wondering about you, that means you’ve gotten into their heads — which puts you above 90% of the ignored whitenoise coming from the scores of betas they sift through every day.

Of course it’s possible that the guy who made the original post didn’t calibrate properly, and the advice of the other posters was spot-on. But as far as what we can take and apply from his experiences, LockDown’s theory is what should be kept in mind. Just a few caveats:

  • Don’t bother trying this on unattractive girls, and keep it to a minimum on average girls. The hotter the girl, the better C&F game works. And while every girl, fat or thin, ugly or pretty, will be curious about the change, why bother if she’s not worth hooking up with?
  • It should be obvious, but save your best C&F game for when you get together outside the workplace. The core of your workplace game should be about leading with authority, constructing an unbreakable frame, and not being overly accommodating to others’ demands. So in other words, demonstrate alpha much more indirectly than directly. The last thing you need is some bullshit sexual harassment suit. But then again, if you’re really C&F’ing correctly, they’re going to feel so disqualified that if you do get in trouble, it will be for simply being an asshole. Not necessarily a bad thing. Calibration is of utmost importance on this one.
  • Don’t actively chase any girl who has LJBF’ed you. Your pursuits should be going towards a new crop of girls. Let the co-worker chicks chase you if they like your game enough. But remember, the best way for that to happen is to combine your C&F with a little dose of preselection.

The Uncrossable Chasm

“All you have to do to pick up chicks is to be confident, dude!”

“You don’t need to run game. Just be yourself, man.”

“If you have to go out scamming on girls to make yourself feel better, they’ll see right through it, bro.”

Odds are if a significant number of people in your life know about your aspirations to learn the Venusian Arts, you’ve heard, in one form or another, all of these retorts from eager advice-givers. Problem is, while these lines are likely fed to you with good intentions, they are all hollow platitudes, and ultimately do nothing but stunt your ability to attract women.

The reason most men get into pick-up is because their history with women is about as successful as the French Army’s history fighting wars. Obviously, these men have been doing something fundamentally wrong. And they look to the world of game to find answers.

The problem is not that these men have never heard the answers, it’s that they’ve never heard the right answers. The lines above are of the generic variety; they have no real-world application for men learning game. Naturals can get away with framing the sexual market in such simplified ways; they’ve always had confidence and never had an issue getting beautiful girls to be attracted to him. And no matter how vapid the lines may sound, they may actually help some naturals and masters keep focused on their goals.

However, recovering AFCs need a completely different brand of advice. They need more than just “confidence.” They need more than just themselves. They need systematic OUTER game intervention, the only bridge to the uncrossable chasm.

The chasm of which I speak, a chasm in which confidence is expected to appear out of the ether, is this:

MAN WITH LITTLE TO NO PAST SUCCESS WITH WOMEN  >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> CONFIDENT MAN HAVING SUCCESS WITH WOMEN

Because inner game rests so much on possessing legitimate, unshakeable, devil-may-care confidence, there is simply no way a man who has never been able to score women will magically cross the chasm without learning more. No amount of feelgood blather to the contrary will change the fact that having the requisite inner game, or confidence, to bed attractive women consistently is based on PAST SUCCESS.

If a man has none of that, he cannot “be himself” and suddenly find success because being himself never worked in the first place. He cannot suddenly acquire confidence from the mirthful mists because he has no experience from which to derive it. Inner game is impossible to attain without positive experiences to fall back on.

So what is such a man to do? Is he out of options? Not if we listen to Roissy, who said, “People who claim that game is trickery designed to fool women into thinking the man is alpha, are wrong. Game will actually alter your perception of yourself and create a positive power feedback loop. Game even alters hormone levels.”

Fortunately, game tactics will provide a man the framework to perfect his outer game first. A man learning correct game may not get laid or even get phone numbers right away, but if he’s doing his homework, and self-aware and self-correcting in his approaches, he will be able to, in effect, fake it til he makes it. DHV routines. Attractive anecdotes. Alpha body language. All these things will assist in creating a man who can, with enough approaches, begin to have the sexual experiences with women that will eventually help him develop his inner game, and thus, foster well-rounded game (of both the inner and outer variety). That is what leads to mastery.

But one does not need to become a master to get laid. One needs to get laid to become a master.

Prince Of England Game

In light of the joyous news from across the Atlantic, I bring you Prince of England Game. Good ol’ boy William is behaving just like your average beta (or RFC, Royal Frustrated Chump), allowing his bride-to-be Kate Middleton to nix an obedience clause from her wedding vow. Those of us who know what’s up are going to have to step in and take the reins.

Prince of England Game is all about options. Options come from status. Having political power (or the figurehead ersatz held by William) isn’t necessary. Charisma, however, is. We need to get to the point where we are flooded with enough possibilities of pussy that we can mentally imbue ourselves with the status of a prince. It doesn’t matter if it’s true; we just have to behave like it’s true. Imagine the difference if men started viewing themselves as the prize and not the other way around. It would make men happier, and it would make women happier. Orgasmically happier.

Obviously, William doesn’t apply Prince of England Game, although he is in a position to do it without afterthought. I illustrate for you, with the example of Will and Kate’s pre-marriage “discussion” (you can bet he didn’t put up much protest), the Alpha vs. Beta dynamic, in dramatic prose format:

Kate: Um, William dear, I think I’m gonna nix that whole obedience part out of my wedding vow.

Beta William: Oh no problem, my darling! After all, it is your special day. Anything I can do to accommodate your every request. In fact, I was going to suggest you extirpate the obedience demand anyway. A barbarian bit of chauvinism, really.

Kate: Um, William dear, I think I’m gonna nix that whole obedience part out of my wedding vow.

Alpha William: Well then I’m gonna have to nix that whole getting married to you decision.

Kate: What?

Alpha William: Yeah. I’ll just have to move on the best I can. I don’t know if I’ll even have time to meet another girl, as I’m so busy being the Prince of England.

Kate: Ya know, on second thought, I’ll just keep it in.

Alpha William: That’s right you will. Go fetch me a beer.

Think it won’t work? Think again. Giving in to demands like these increases a woman’s resentment towards you. The Prince will soon be reaping the fruits of his beta ways. I suspect the chapters in his biography will one day be entitled as such:

On getting married- Better Kate than Never

On his marriage- Will and Kate Plus Hate

On his wife’s attitude toward him- Fire at Will

On his loss of attraction for his aging wife- The Prince and the Flopper

On his fate- Royally Screwed