Five Roadblocks To Game

Hey all! After a bit of a hiatus, the Colonel is back in the blogosphere. Look for more frequent posts presently.

1. Procrastination/Fatigue/Laziness/Apathy (PFLA)

To run game on a girl, you must first talk to a girl. But to talk to a girl, you have to put yourself in a situation that allows for that opportunity. Often, I’ve noticed the biggest hurdle to get over in mastering my own game is the procrastination (“I’ll go out tomorrow”), fatigue (“I’m too tired to sarge”), laziness (“I’m comfortable just hanging out with my friends tonight”), and apathy (“I don’t care anymore”) that seem to all come so naturally, regardless of whatever motivation I had the night before.

If you experience PFLA in any way, know that it is the saboteur of inner game. It hides under the guise of one’s own “comfort zone.” It makes men lie to themselves. It is so prevalent because it puts comfort first, and what guy doesn’t naturally gravitate to situations and surroundings that are comfortable? And what’s more comfortable? Laying around on your couch on a Friday night watching Family Guy or going out to a bar and applying what you’ve learned on attractive girls you haven’t yet met?

To break the spell of being a slave to one’s desire for comfort uber alles (and by God, don’t think you have to go out every night- every man needs a break), constantly remind yourself that one night of sex with a beautiful woman is more satisfying than watching 100 episodes of your favorite television program. And soon, you’ll find that it won’t just be one night, but many. Eventually, the tight pussy of hot co-eds will become your comfort zone.

2. Convincing yourself game isn’t really necessary

If you make a habit of surrounding yourself with a lot of plain jane female friends and nice guy beta types who don’t know what’s up, you will find yourself falling into the trap of putting aside all you know in the world of game, no matter how much of The Mystery Method you’ve been reading. Because reality trumps fantasy every time, you will find yourself reverting back to your old ways in no time once faced with the pressure of turning what you know into what you do. You may have your openers and routines down pat, you may know game inside and out, but if your real-world situations aren’t inviting to the utilization of game, your learning will profit you nothing.

Also, as long as you surround yourself with others who don’t believe in or understand your new-found PUA lifestyle, or who live in complete ignorance of game, it will find a way of rubbing off on you. The AFC inside you will slowly begin coming to the surface no matter how much you try to deny it.

To fight this, make sure you apply the principle of accountability. You’ve got to make yourself accountable to someone else. It is rare to find the man who learned game and did all the field work solo; his amount of will power would have to be extraordinarily high. So find someone who will go out sarging with you, or who will, at the very least, hold you accountable to achieving your lofty goals. If not, your encounters (if you have any at all) will flatline over time. You will slowly gravitate to your friends’ version of reality, and decide that game is unnecessary. And then, my good man, the 8’s and 9’s you’ve had your eye on will convince themselves that sleeping with you is also unnecessary.

3. Approach Anxiety/Self-Confidence issues

For most men who are receptive to game, the most difficult part remains the seemingly small step of simply opening their mouths to that pretty girl and saying something, anything. It doesn’t matter how much PUA literature and advice you have ingested, or how many openers and gambits you have memorized; if you don’t have the self-confidence to step out there and actually talk to real-life women, you’ve got nothing. Your progression has halted.

In fact, if approach anxiety absolutely cripples you, you will find that you will soon be on a path of regression, because you can no longer take cover under the “Ignorance is Bliss” shelter of the obtuse betas. Once the floodgates of knowledge open, you have no choice but to apply or be miserable. Your depression will grow in a way you couldn’t have imagined before understanding game, because you really know what you’re missing out on. And you will come to realize that you are to blame, no one else. The girl previously thought to be out of your league can be yours, and could have been all along. But your unwillingness to man up and do the work involved at attracting her to you will keep her forever out of your grasp. Ultimately, what is worse? Accepting you just don’t have what it takes and never will or knowing that you could be better but you choose not to?

Gentlemen, for your own well-being, get out there and say something. Even if you get blown out, the dignity and experience that comes with the interaction will be myriad times more rewarding to you than wondering what could have been.

4. Taking girls too seriously

As a corollary to #3, it seems as though this is the underlying reason why so many guys succumb to their approach anxiety- they just take girls (the attractive ones, at least) too damn seriously. I will go so far as to say that this is likely the fundamental problem with any man who has fucked up with a woman, whether in the approach, during the first date, or in a long-term relationship. He did something that showed he took her too seriously, and it caused her to lose her respect for him. Girls do not want to be pedestalized, and being too intent, too earnest in your interactions with them will have them lowering your value in no time. It shows a lack of experience and preselection (“Why is this guy putting so much stock into our conversation? He must not talk to a lot of women”).

We must learn to not put so much stock into each and every encounter we have with a girl (again, this is applicable at any stage, from the approach to a marriage) and not worry about the possible rejection or anger that could come as a result. Of course, that doesn’t mean we should abandon common sense, or completely abandon serious conversation altogether, but as a general rule, chicks are attracted to aloofness. Being overly serious in interactions with her is the complete opposite of that.

As far as the approach goes, we will make more approaches (and thus have a better chance at obtaining a girl’s number, or taking a girl home, or getting a girlfriend) if we adopt an attitude of disinterest. We must become disinterested (not uninterested) in the outcome of all our interactions if we are to win this game. We can’t ever forget it’s a numbers game. When we learn to shed the beta attributes of being overly serious, pedestalizing, and investing too much too soon, we will begin to see our successes skyrocket.

5. Guilt

This is likely the biggest roadblock for those who have begun to master game. Ultimately, a PUA will break hearts. There’s just no way around it. And in the process, there will be a degree of guilt (unless you’re just a soulless monster). That guilt can wreak havoc on a man’s game.

What must be realized, however, is that everything a man did to win a girl over, he did because he followed the rules that she laid out. She was not taken by force, she was taken by her own will. Let’s assume, because you know game, she was with you because she wanted to be with you. If she’s with you for any other selfish or rationalized reason, you will soon be dumped for the nearest alpha who so much as glances in her direction. So if, for whatever reason, you’re not feeling it, and you do something to her that eventually hurts her (and this doesn’t necessarily even mean cheating), know that she would have done the same to you had she felt the same way.

In this game, unless you’ve met that person you plan to spend time and all eternity in bliss with (good luck), eventually it’s either dump or be dumped. When girls let a guy go, I swear, it’s almost like they get a thrill out of it. It brings them satisfaction. Men, on the other hand, find it to be a difficult and grating experience. I’d venture to say that even though the pop belief is that females are the more pure, well-meaning sex, it is males who feel more guilt when shit hits the fan. But we must refrain from allowing guilt to consume us. Once it gets to the point in which you refrain from running game on a girl because of it, guess what? She will move on to the next alpha who is a heartbreak waiting to happen. So what do you profit by letting her go? And what does she profit by you not going after her?

If guilt continues to be a grating problem for you, just think back to your pre-game past and all the bullshit girls have put you through over the years, and it will ease the guilt, I promise. Any girl with any noticeable amount of attractiveness whatsoever has broken many a man’s heart in her past, whether knowingly or unknowingly. She can afford to take a dose of her own medicine.